The strength in being vulnerable

The strength in being vulnerable

We grew up being shamed or scorned for crying, showing our frustrations, and maybe not being polite or socially engaged when we were going through something challenging and felt like we needed to retract. ​

​Growing up, I was the type of child with BIG emotions (still am he, he). I would instantly bounce back, and I could not understand why others would reminisce about things that happened. It has been a life lesson for me, accepting that everybody has their way of dealing with grief, anger, disappointment, and frustrations and that it has NOTHING to do with Me. ​

Working with patients on the energetic manifestations of emotional trauma and social conditionings for the past two decades, I see more and more, even in myself how the “issues in the tissues” (as a teacher of mine used to say) such as PAIN, just get stuck and result in several dysfunctions in the physical body.​​
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We have molded our coping mechanisms around what our society deems acceptable and have come to shelter ourselves from rawness. 
We don't want to see it. (even birth and death that are now removed from us) 
We don't want to hear it. 
We don't want to feel it. 
We find ways to bypass the pain, anything to keep us occupied and in a state of avoidance.​

Photo credit: Eugene Van Ballegooyen

As of late, on a collective energetic level, so many karmic debts are being experienced. This is something ancient traditions such as in India and Egypt believe in, and address. I have had profound remembrances through past-life hypnotherapy from a gifted healer friend Alexa Little Star that has helped me identify why I am experiencing a specific pattern of pain that no doctor or bodyworker could resolve.​

I also had this very discerning transcending experience around blood lineage karmic debt with Anubis, at Sekhmets’ chapel at the Karnak Temple Complex in Luxor. Anubis as the Gatekeeper, psychopomp archetype, and an expression of my higher consciousness showed me what I needed to continue doing to resolve my mother’s karmic debts. Whether you believe in this or not, it is a principle that is very real for many people, and all cultures or religious practices have various ways of relating to this concept and addressing it. 
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This is the same for grieving and dealing with huge losses. During ancient Egyptian times, being in mourning (lamenting) was a sanctified right of passage with a designated mourner, countless texts refer to even goddess Isis serving as that mourner. They would sing to the dead with dedicated mourning songs, filled with intense emotion, a ritual that would last for days where they would be screaming and wailing in sound. This was an appropriate way of expressing the pain and releasing it. 

We have become ashamed of showing this kind of pain and vulnerability, bottling it up inside. That's why I so enjoy my women's empowerment and re-wilding work, where we would go into the forest allowing ourselves to scream and truly express all our anger without being “stoned” as a woman, or “labeled with hysteria” like they used to do in the old times. Connect with my Soar in Womanhood community.

I feel like I am still holding trauma from when My mother tragically died a decade ago and I lost my baby in the second trimester, after which I went to the ER and was yelled at for screaming by the nurse. 
So Please I plead with you, 
Be with the pain as it arises
Be with the suffering 
Be vulnerable
Be okay to fall apart in that moment
Be okay to scream and cry and shout again!
Feel held in ALL of this. 
During my Shamanic initiation work (Lear more about Soar with your Ka) we do Fire ceremonies where we will conjure up all this pain, feel it, sound it out and offer it to the fire to burn away. This is such a healing ceremony. 
I feel that in society more of this is needed as there is so much anger, hatred, and violence. The commonly felt sense is that of hopelessness and powerlessness. 

However, we sooo do! We can take back our power and hope by allowing ourselves to first forgive ourselves and then others, truly express ALL of our emotions as it comes up, and be fully present and aware. 
Can we allow that? 
Can we first allow that for ourselves?
Can we allow that for our loved ones, partners, and our children? 
It's so darn uncomfortable to be with somebody that's falling apart, taking us to that place when we felt utter vulnerable and lost. A reminder of suppressed feelings still trapped manifesting in chronic pain.
I must admit this has been truly challenging for me as a mother holding space for my kids when they are fully expressive and I am feeling deeply triggered. Share your comments and experience in  SOAR In Motherhood community.

Watch this movie on how this dad holds space for his toddler.. Imagine all fathers experienced this type of support growing up and can do that for their children. How will our current events be different when fathers growing up were shown how to be raw and vulnerable in a healthy way.
We could however now start by asking.. what will feel nurturing to you? 
How can I support you? 
​This is the human experience we all have agreed to experience in this lifetime. This concept inspired me to create the Soundfull Birth method. All the sounds that we express during birth from the ecstatic pleasurable, to the most wailing painful sounds, are the full expression of all that we can experience in life. It's the perfect metaphor for life, and it's all ALLOWED!

I wish you a safe container, a space to be vulnerable, raw, witnessed, and held. One of gentleness and kindness to yourself and others so that you can truly release the PAIN. ​

If you have never been on a PILGRIMAGE this offers such a space. Learn More